Things That are Totally True (TTTT).

All of the following things are totally, undeniably, 100% true. And if you deny them, you are Satan or Carrot Top or some equally evil and unlikable person.

1. JAPANESE PEOPLE ARE TOO NON-CONFRONTATIONAL.
I spent the entire day with a smattering of blueberry jam on my face, AND NO ONE SAID A WORD. One might think, "Well Vash, didn't you go to the bathroom? Didn't you at least glance in the mirror while you were washing your post-toilet hands?" Good question! But I peed in the forest all day today. Because that's what I do. I follow monkeys and pee in the forest when I need to. No mirror, no sink. I didn't use a proper bathroom until after dinner, a dinner at which I spent a good 2-3 full hours sitting/talking with Japanese people who didn't say a word to me about my jam. Asses.

2. JAPANESE PEOPLE MAKE HUGE UNDERSTATEMENTS.
I visited a different troops of monkeys last week because I would like to start studying them in the coming months. I went with a Japanese friend who knew the troop so that he could introduce me and show me the lay of the land and what not. Even though he assured me that these monkeys were well habituated to human observers and a very friendly troop, they were aggressive and scary as fuck. We both were attacked for no reason and had to fend off those little bastards with pointy sticks, AKA nature's baseball bat. Usually when this type of situation occurs, it is always best to show submissive, non-threatening monkey-style behavior and back away because generally the monkeys don't want to hurt you/are somewhat afraid of you and will avoid serious conflicts at any cost. However! They were so aggressive that we had no choice but to show threatening behavior because they definitely would have harmed us if we did not defend ourselves. So there I was taking swipes at the dominant male while friend was defending my backside with his own pointy stick, and this sort of thing happened 3 TIMES with two different troops in the same area. WTF!?! He told me this type of thing has never happened in the year that he has spent with them. We returned to the station and were asked about the state of the troop over dinner, to which my Japanese friend replied, "Well, they were a bit unfriendly." And that was it. Fucking understatement of the year, that one. I could go on and on about this.

3. I had a third truth at the beginning of this entry but I've now become so worked up over #2's events that I have forgotten it. Stupid monkeys. Replacing my memories with RAGE.

And just so I don't sound too bitter, some recent PROs:

1. I am living on a small island to the south of Kyushu and it is absolutely GORGEOUS. In a single view, I get lush and essentially untouched forest and clear blue ocean, in addition to quaint Japanese things such as an old fisherman fishing in a boat or an old-fashioned wooden Japanese house with smoke coming out the top.

2. I HAVE A SCOOTER AND IT'S AWESOME.

3. I have made my peace with those big brown Huntsmen spiders as they are everywhere and eat mosquitoes.

4. The people that I live with cook awesome food.

Future Topics (more for myself so I don't forget if enRAGEd):

1. Find the words to describe what I call the self-righteous Japanese woman. And why I hate her.

2. Finnish food.

Bye!